Standing on the Promises

It's a little past 8:30 and my house is completely silent. Two very sleepy boys crashed right on time tonight, which almost never happens. Keith is away on a business trip, which also almost never happens. Guapo is napping. That pretty much always happens. And I am left alone to savor the quiet.


So here I sit in complete silence (minus the hum of the dishwasher), enjoying a cup of coffee and wondering what in the world to do now. In the midst of the chaos of raising two boys, I spend a lot of time craving silence, but when the moment finally arrives, I find myself searching for what to do with it. Tonight, I decided to write a little. So here we are...


When I think about the events of the past three weeks, my head just swims. So much has happened, so many things have come and gone off my "to do" list. But there is one event that is sticking with me in a very powerful way.

Sam's best friend at school lost his Dad a few weeks ago. Even now, I have a hard time getting my brain around the idea. One day, he was here...39 years old...by all indications, a strong and healthy man. The next minute, he was gone. The Friday before Easter, his heart failed him and his time on this earth came to an end. So unexpected...so very shocking.


There are so many questions left behind. Why would God allow this to happen? Why should a precious little boy and his amazing big sister have to grow up without a Daddy? What happens to a wife that is suddenly widowed at such a young age? How does she raise these sweeties alone?

A million questions have run through my mind and honestly, I find myself arguing with God over why this had to happen. I wish I had answers for her. I wish I had words to comfort her. But the only words I can think of sound so incredibly inadequate in light of the road she is walking.

I tried to put myself in her shoes. If I was her, what words would comfort me? Frankly, her experience terrifies me. If it could happen to her, it could happen to any of us. God never promised us tomorrow. I know that in my mind. My heart is another story altogether. Keith and I have been married for 10 years this June and I am still so very in love with him. I pray that will always be true. And just the thought that God could take him home and leave me here to do this alone is crushing to me. I think of how many times a day he crosses my mind and wonder how I could ever let that go. There are no words...

Then, God reminded me that there may not be easy words, but there are promises....promises that I can stand on in the midst of the unthinkable.

"So do not fear, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

"The Lord is close to the broken hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all. " Psalm 34:18-19

"Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:28-30

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or dismayed. For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

"And my God will supply all your needs according to his riches and glory in Christ Jesus." Phillipians 1:9

"You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you because he trusts you." Isaiah 26:3

Will these verses make the pain go away? Sadly, no.

Will it make her road easy? No.

But when facing the unthinkable, when I have no strength to carry on, I hope that I remember to fall in the arms of the One willing to carry on for me....in His name and for His glory.